emotional tunnel vision

it made no difference to her.
i had thousands of joker cards
they bookmarked the books or
were the books bookmarking them?
spilled out of tumblers stained carpet
and filled out pockets junked the
junk drawers

so she took one her wrist snapped back
fast when it spun free I couldn’t look away

it doesn’t make a difference to her
I know every one of those cards by name
by history we have history part of me
she can’t understand, how can I rate them
or rank them rate my lungs over my heart
my heart over my brain left ear over right never
engaged in that senseless exercise these are
part of me lose one
I have a hole now mourning
the whole

the card sailed into the fire

she doesn’t even see me
she doesn’t know how she fits
even as i put my face to her neck
to drink perfection
neither the moon nor any one star
but whatever holds them together
she told me she’d never been in love

im not in her tunnel
i dont have a tunnel
i see her and a thousand others

my card curled
it wasn’t the smallest one
but it screamed and i screamed

so yeah your honor i broke her arm
sue me.


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