probably should be asleep

science doesn’t stop my ankle from hurting
the phd candidate who taught my cog psy class made sure to tell us that there is no established link between arthritis flair ups and environmental conditions
but that doesn’t stop my knee from hurting
methodology, like there is no causal link,
i don’t even have to see the clouds obscuring usually clear azure skies
how can clouds miles in the sky cause pain in my knee way down here
skepticism doesn’t stop my whole leg from having a headache

i was sleepy all day and my leg hurts
i fell asleep listening to SBSP

people said my cat was fat so I’ve put him on a diet
and incidentally by the way I’ve retaught him how to sit
you didn’t know cats can sit, but they can

does he feel lighter or is that some bias
do i expect him to feel lighter and then perceive it as so

i really don’t want my leg to hurt when it gets cloudy but it does anyway even though the research says no

I’m so bored and anxious and my petition isn’t done
rain shine or migraine it’ll be worked upon tomorrow

so I can sit here and read fMRI lectures
or I can drag out my theory textbook and read that

or I can paint a picture in my mind of fair Romeo and me
remembering I lost Nurse and Paris in the fray
or forget about Nurse and Paris and disagree freely

and accidentally make conciliatory derogatory comments
about fMRI while Im reading and laugh lemons

or listen to Charlie’s Creek and write a long message on a tombstone to something barely won and then destroyed

or have a wild indigenous peasant girl call Pyotr Alexeyevich Petya
and make a tiger called Lapushka roll on to her back and purr

if Im going to have a ridiculous fantasy, it should be truly ridiculous
it should be contrived and filled with inaccuracies
and devoted to a princely looking Russian boy in California

i could remember where i left off with Nephele before I fell in love
how did I fall
I could read Being and Time
but I wont be getting it until my birthday

i should probably be asleep
but my ankle hurts


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